WHarleen Vij, 35, started it first. date The idea of her partner becoming DINKs (couples with dual income and no children) was clear from the beginning.
Viji, a Nagpur-based social media expert, said, “The post I shared on my stories about why a woman's worth shouldn't be attached to motherhood inspired us to share her thoughts on Instagram. We connected,” he said. “We shared similar ideas about parenthood and we had already decided as individuals not to have children. And it was fortunate that our paths crossed.”
Viji and her partner are part of a growing number of couples who are consciously choosing to stay married. childless lifestyle. This choice allows you to enjoy the benefits of a dual-income household while avoiding the costs associated with raising children.
According to Gitnux Market Data Report 2024, India's DINK population is growing at 30 percent annually. In fact, the last census conducted in 2011 shows that the DINK lifestyle is prevalent in nearly 42 percent of rural two-family households. compared to 22% of similar families in urban areas.
A key factor in Vij and her partner's decision to become DINKs was the “mental and physical labor that would be required.” Raise children“I love my children, but I do not consider myself fully responsible for another human being.'' The intolerable economy necessary to maintain a good and comfortable life for them Not to mention the economic costs,” Vij said.
According to Vij, between the pandemic, lack of jobs, and the burden of debt and inflation, not having children seems like a wise choice. According to a 2021 report from the Pew Research Center, 61% of millennials said they don't have children simply because they can't afford it.
As for Deviparna Chakraborty, a 33-year-old resident of Kolkata, this decision comes from a desire for freedom. “This freedom means being able to enjoy vacations and spend free time doing what we like. Our schedules are our own. If we want to go on a trip or an event, we can change our children's schedules. You don't have to consider childcare or worry about childcare,'' the film critic said.
A growing subgroup among DINKs is DINKWAD (double working, no children, owning a dog). Among them is his Bangalore-based PR account manager Rakhi Tushil, 25, who said being Dinkwad was “the best decision I've made so far with no regrets.” I feel that it was. “So far, I have never felt incomplete, as society preaches. It’s not the only way to feel either,” she said.
Before they started dating, Tusil and his partner each had pet dogs. Now there are four of them together. When asked if she plans to have children in the future, Tushir said her real plan is to foster and adopt more animals in need. “It's a lot of love and licking. Don't be afraid to take chances,” she said.
Meanwhile, Anurag Kumar Sankrithyayan, 34, a senior consultant in Bangalore, likes to call himself a “GINK'' (green-leaning, childless). “I strongly believe that sustainability. Looking at the current order of our world, it seems unlikely that our planet has enough resources to meet the needs of its current population. Climate change is making it more difficult to ensure our survival. “When all this comes to mind, I can't imagine my own children who may have to suffer because of bad weather and scarce resources,” he said.
Sankrityayan, a married couple with disabilities, say that they and their partner are committed to improving the quality of life for marginalized people. “I suffered a gunshot wound 10 years ago that left me paralyzed from the chest down. There are many people with similar disabilities who have children, but because we both work, we are able to afford the necessary treatment. I feel like I can support some people with spinal cord injuries who don't have the money.”
DINK Life Choice
The term has been around since the late 1980s, during the heyday of yuppie culture to describe the lives led by young urban professionals, but has recently gained traction on social media, particularly TikTok and Instagram. Many couples are sharing snippets of themselves. life without childrenemphasizes the benefits gained through travel, free time, and the luxuries you can afford.
Gautami Devi Chhetri, a clinical psychologist at Lissun, attributes this trend to changing social attitudes towards family dynamics. “Cultural perceptions have evolved over time, and the choice not to have children is now more widely accepted, reflecting changing notions of personal fulfillment.”
Dr. Gitanjali Natarajan, chief clinical psychology consultant at Niyama Digital Healthcare, says the main sociological reasons that contributed to the DINK lifestyle are the shift from a collectivistic and interdependent society to a more individualistic society. It was explained that. “Individuals strive to exercise personal freedom in important areas of life, such as career, where to stay, and marriage, including childbearing. They don’t follow the social rules and norms that they used to.”
Also, in our modern life, professional development And for many, career comes first. “With the burden of childcare removed, DINK couples have more time and energy to devote to work and career advancement. There may also be more opportunities for personal growth, self-discovery, and pursuing passion,” said Sidharth S. Kumar, relationship coach at NumroVani.
Contrary to popular belief, DINK couples have free will and agency to choose not to have children and should not be confused with childless couples. Parul Bhandari, a sociologist at the University of Cambridge, said: “DINK couples are not the super detached, unambitious couples with no feelings or love that many stereotypes would have us believe.” Ta. “Rather, their spiritual or humanitarian perspective may have led them to make this decision,” she added.
Bhandari, an author of many academic books, said that while our society is witnessing the rise of consumerism and growing individuality, there is also a corresponding rise in interest in spirituality and communalism. “Many couples may choose the DINK life in order to devote more time to spiritual or humanitarian causes. Those who do not want to bring a new life into this already competitive and difficult world There are some.”
Disadvantage
The number one criticism that DINK couples tend to invite is self-interest and selfishness. “This bias can be especially difficult for women who feel pressure to have children and prioritize family over career and personal goals,” says Chhetri. “Being constantly monitored or questioned about your decisions by others can be a stressor, leading to feelings of judgment, self-doubt, or isolation, and can lead to feelings of anxiety and inadequacy. It can cause a feeling of being.”
Another concern is about retirement. Who will take care of you when you get old? “Without children to rely on for care and support in old age, DINK couples may need to invest in expensive long-term care services or rely on paid caregivers. financial security And retirement benefits may also be affected by this,” Kumar said.
And that's where loneliness comes in. “While it may seem rewarding for young couples, it can leave them feeling isolated and meaningless later in life.'' DINK couples find their social circles shrink as their friends and classmates start families. This can contribute to feelings of loneliness and emptiness,” said Ashmeen Munjal, a mental health and relationship expert.
Before deciding to adopt the DINK lifestyle, Chhetri advises reviewing the following important guidelines:
- Consider whether your choice not to have children is temporary or long-term.
- Be clear about your motives, own your decisions, and make sure your decisions are not simply influenced by trends. This will help reduce the mental conflict about choosing a DINK lifestyle.
- Open communication and strong social networks reduce anxiety and promote positive mental health.
- Spend time doing self-care activities that promote mental health, such as exercising, meditating, reading, pursuing a hobby, or practicing mindfulness.
- Set clear boundaries between work and personal life to avoid becoming vulnerable to burnout and exhaustion.
- Life is dynamic and unexpected difficulties can arise. Being adaptable and resilient as a couple can help you navigate these challenges more effectively and reduce potential stress.